It felt good to be honest, even though I was really anxious about saying anything. But I can’t be a liar. A lie is what broke us, and I think since then I’ve avoided every little white lie, and every huge lie possible. It’s just not worth it, one lie made me want to take my own life, caused so much unnecessary pain, you being so selfish.. I don’t want to do that to anyone, ever. No matter what it is, it’s just not right.
I bought mason jars to use as cups, but they remind me of you.
I guess that’s what happens when you open yourself up to someone. When you tell them all of the little details about you, that you thought were insignificant to anyone, while sitting in a bathtub together until 5 in the morning. It makes you feel so at peace and so loved. You trust them without making them earn it, and it just feels right. You feel safe. You smile like a child in elementary school and your eyes light up with happiness over the smallest things. When you wake up everyday feeling like you mean something to someone, you wont ever want to feel anything else. Its when you’re alive instead of just living. You have memories that you’ll keep buried deep in your heart, for the rest of your life, that no one can replace. But you know what sucks? That you’ll never let another person get that close to you, because in the end, they rip your fucking heart out and laugh at everything you thought you had.
Listening to a mixed cd called “MANIA” remembering things I wish I could forget.
A FUCKING MEN